Tuesday, November 11, 2003
**WARNING - greatly disjointed thoughts now appearing below**
*sigh* Guess I have been a little remiss in updating things this past week.... You know when I first started reading blogs I thought what wonderfully written voices so many people have... By reading them I can actually try to reconnect my brain w/reality and grown up topics... Then I started my own - driven by the need to release my pain but then it evolved and I had such high hopes of posting cleaver, interesting, intelligent thoughts but it's really just a bitchfest about my own boring life isn't it??? I am gonna have to work on that cause I am boring even myself lately...
And now... more drivel about the kids!
Dilen is still sick - not overly so but just enough to make him clingy and whiney ALL DAY. Deven seems to be stuck in a cycle that is getting to be hard to control - the highs are high and lows are LOW - I know having Dad home hasn't helped much but Deven has been having some REALLY rough moments recently that even I can't deal with... Dad is no help - he just comments that Deven is headed for Juvie w/his behavior and I need to get it under control, that my brother and I would NEVER think of acting/speaking as Deven does because we would have gotten our asses whooped, etc and makes off comments to the kids about them being babies, rotten, etc... GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR I DO love my father and other then beating his head in I don't know what to do to make him understand my kids are JUST FINE as they are - problem is they aren't like other kids so you can't expect them to behave as such.... Now I will admit they are slightly spoiled but I am working on breaking the nasty little habit they have of thinking they get something EVERYTIME we go to a store and that I will NOT put up w/them acting like they have NO manners or listening ears in public... but on the same note you need to really work on picking your battles because just a simple "No you can't ..... " that all children are told now and again can set off a bipolar child leading to a 30 min ++++++ meltdown.... But enough about all that...
Daddy got out of the hospital on Halloween, he's been doing ok we have alot of follow up doc appts but other then that he's ok... We took a short trip to MD to see my aunt and mother - we stopped to see my grandmother - all in all it wasn't the best of trips overall but it wasn't a horrible one either... Grandma is doing very well in the aspect of eating, etc but man she's just not mentally in great shape nor are things well w/her heart and it all breaks my heart.... As does the interactions of my father with his sisters - I never realized just how much tension there is between them.... but alas I am sure every family has a similar story...
On a lighter note - Dad and I will be participating in the quarterly Award and Retirement Ceremony next week - He will be recognized for the 40 yrs of service he will have when he retires Feb and I am getting an award for my work on midnights the past 2+ yrs... It's an Commendation Medal for Civilian Service for those familiar w/the military/federal service.... it's a big deal to get and an even bigger deal for someone of my low grade (pay) level... I am very excited about it...
I have fallen behind in keeping up w/the boards and my friends but I hope to catch up soon... {{{HUGS}}} to everyone...
Well there is a particularly annoying supervisor on tonight (it's the same one I bitched about months ago - she's back UGH UGH UGH) so I better go - plus I have been working on this post for over 2 hrs and my train of thought has been lost repeatedly and it's turned into a collection of wild, disjointed ramblings... Til next time...
*sigh* Guess I have been a little remiss in updating things this past week.... You know when I first started reading blogs I thought what wonderfully written voices so many people have... By reading them I can actually try to reconnect my brain w/reality and grown up topics... Then I started my own - driven by the need to release my pain but then it evolved and I had such high hopes of posting cleaver, interesting, intelligent thoughts but it's really just a bitchfest about my own boring life isn't it??? I am gonna have to work on that cause I am boring even myself lately...
And now... more drivel about the kids!
Dilen is still sick - not overly so but just enough to make him clingy and whiney ALL DAY. Deven seems to be stuck in a cycle that is getting to be hard to control - the highs are high and lows are LOW - I know having Dad home hasn't helped much but Deven has been having some REALLY rough moments recently that even I can't deal with... Dad is no help - he just comments that Deven is headed for Juvie w/his behavior and I need to get it under control, that my brother and I would NEVER think of acting/speaking as Deven does because we would have gotten our asses whooped, etc and makes off comments to the kids about them being babies, rotten, etc... GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR I DO love my father and other then beating his head in I don't know what to do to make him understand my kids are JUST FINE as they are - problem is they aren't like other kids so you can't expect them to behave as such.... Now I will admit they are slightly spoiled but I am working on breaking the nasty little habit they have of thinking they get something EVERYTIME we go to a store and that I will NOT put up w/them acting like they have NO manners or listening ears in public... but on the same note you need to really work on picking your battles because just a simple "No you can't ..... " that all children are told now and again can set off a bipolar child leading to a 30 min ++++++ meltdown.... But enough about all that...
Daddy got out of the hospital on Halloween, he's been doing ok we have alot of follow up doc appts but other then that he's ok... We took a short trip to MD to see my aunt and mother - we stopped to see my grandmother - all in all it wasn't the best of trips overall but it wasn't a horrible one either... Grandma is doing very well in the aspect of eating, etc but man she's just not mentally in great shape nor are things well w/her heart and it all breaks my heart.... As does the interactions of my father with his sisters - I never realized just how much tension there is between them.... but alas I am sure every family has a similar story...
On a lighter note - Dad and I will be participating in the quarterly Award and Retirement Ceremony next week - He will be recognized for the 40 yrs of service he will have when he retires Feb and I am getting an award for my work on midnights the past 2+ yrs... It's an Commendation Medal for Civilian Service for those familiar w/the military/federal service.... it's a big deal to get and an even bigger deal for someone of my low grade (pay) level... I am very excited about it...
I have fallen behind in keeping up w/the boards and my friends but I hope to catch up soon... {{{HUGS}}} to everyone...
Well there is a particularly annoying supervisor on tonight (it's the same one I bitched about months ago - she's back UGH UGH UGH) so I better go - plus I have been working on this post for over 2 hrs and my train of thought has been lost repeatedly and it's turned into a collection of wild, disjointed ramblings... Til next time...
